She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
