I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
