Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
