vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
