Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
