i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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