Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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