singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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