2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
