ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I need a burrito and a hug.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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