i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
