I am spending my child support on dildos
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
