fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Randomize
