I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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