smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Randomize
