He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
