You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
