If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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