I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
