I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Enjoy the penises
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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