She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
