if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
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