White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
