My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
vagina is talking i cant
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
