Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
