my sisters under your porch take her home
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Randomize
