look no pants
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
