hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
You pole danced in your parka.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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