i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
