Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
don't judge my taste in strippers
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
