that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Randomize
