it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
