Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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