and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
