He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
I need moral support for this bender
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
The power of my boobs compel you
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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