When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize