I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
