the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
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