We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
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