i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
