hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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