The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
