K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Randomize
