check it out our google latitudes are spooning
People in love make me want to vomit
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
