I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
