one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
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