omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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