i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize