he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize