I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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