HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
Randomize